Life’s journal…

haven’t updated my blog or written a post for quite some time now… eversince Poopsie died, i lost interest…

Viw, thanks for the sentiment!

now, i just don’t know what to post… been busy lately taking care of the puppies (Poopsie’s babies)… im actually enjoying doing it… its not a burden for me… waking up every two hours between 10pm - 8am… its like working on night shift… but its fun nursing two little cute pom-poms, Poopsie Jr. (looks and acts exactly like her mom) and Princess (color of her dad and looks like a polar bear)… they’re my stress-reliever!

viw, thanks for the birthday greeting so aivee finally emailed you… she hopes to visit here next year… hope you will too…

just came from Zamboanga for fiesta.. i really had a blast being with my dear "barkadas" again… i miss them… i miss Zamboanga… too bad i only stayed there for a week… hope you guys can come here also… like before! Elli & Nash!

i miss you so much guys!

It was a very tiring day for me. I was up til dawn, busy taking care of two small and delicate, cute Pomeranian newborns.  It was like working night shifts.  Had to wake up every two hours since its their feeding time.  At 8 am, they were turned over to our helper since its her turn now to be the nurse…Day shift naman siya kung baga.  Then i decided to catch up on sleep, placed a note saying the puppies are downstairs and a big DO NOT DISTURB sign on my door, hoping to have a beauty rest for 8 straight hours or more.  Just 2 hours after, i was awakened by a knock on my door.  I thought, "Pambihira naman oh! Di ba niya nabasa yung nakasulat sa labas? Isn’t my writing big enough?" I didn’t open it and tried to fall back to sleep.  The knock wouldn’t stop and got even harder.  So I got up and opened the damn door saying, "Ano ba? Natutulog yung tao!" with a higher tone of voice.  I got angrier when i saw it was my brother disturbing me, knowing that he did it just to piss me off.  But it was a bit strange. When i saw my brother’s face,  I couldn’t understand the facial expression im seeing from him.  He wanted to say something. Then it happened…

The day before, around 10:30 am, we rushed Poopsie to the veterinarian clinic because she was trying to give birth to her first pup but the delivery was breech and the puppy was stuck from the waist down in her birth canal and 30 minutes had already passed she couldn’t let it out.  The puppy was too big since the normal size of a newborn Pomeranian is very small that two could actually fit on the palm of one’s hand. At the clinic, the surgeon was able to help Poopsie deliver the puppy out but half of its body had been inside for too long and they suspected it could have suffocated.  They tried reviving it for 10 minutes but to no avail, the puppy died. The other two left inside could be of the same size so the surgeon decided to perform a caesarian operation on Poopsie.  It was successful.  Poopsie was ok during the first few hours and was able to breast-feed her two baby girls.  As time passed, the anaesthesia started to wear-off and Poopsie was beginning to feel the pain. At 8 pm, my mom was supposed to pick her up at the clinic along with the two puppies but Poopsie was becoming weaker. The vet suggested to leave Poopsie behind overnight so they can further monitor her health. My brother and i, on the other hand, were waiting at home and very excited to see the puppies.  Too bad Poopsie wasn’t with them, but we thought it would be better that way since we wouldn’t know what to do if Poopsie went home, with her status, there might have been a complication.  We then fed the puppies with a milk replacer and tucked them in.

Then morning came…… My brother finally broke to me the dreadful news. As he stood by my door, with a sad low tone he said "Gusto ko lang sabihin na patay na si Poopsie."  Suddenly, i switched from an angry mode to a i-couldn’t-explain-what-i-feel mode. I was speechless.  Not a single word could come out of my mouth.  I said to my self, "Is this a joke? Is my brother joking? But why? He wouldn’t do that. Not with Poopsie."  He then confirmed it that the vet called up earlier saying that Poopsie died of a heart attack due to stress from the delivery and operation.  I don’t know what to feel. I wanted to blame the vet that maybe they didn’t do their job properly. Or blame us that we should’ve brought her home `coz she must’ve thought we were leaving her there for good.  I didn’t know what to do. I just brokedown and cry…

Poopsie has been like our baby in the house. She was an intelligent dog.  Very lively, cheerful, proud, always wants attention and lovable.  I’ll always remember my fun times with Poopsie.  She may be gone but she left us with two beautiful puppies and i know when they grow up they  will be just like their mom.

Poopsie
January 13, 2003 - Septemebr 8, 2005

To all former co-benchers, classmates, batchmates, schoolmates…or what Viw has said "anyone who has been acquainted with ‘The Bench’…" if you could spare a piece of your precious time, check out this cool website, "The Virtual Bench", created by Viw. (click on it at the sidebar)

You definitely won’t regret it!… but if you’re too busy, then i got three words for you… YOUR LOSS!!…Sucker!!

Viw, i’m still looking for pics of ‘the bench’…. wait! …… oh that’s why i can’t find any `coz all of my pics are with the TERE! i guess she stashed it in her bag while she was at my place during my birthday…or when she stayed overnight…or was it Christmas?! tsk! tsk! tsk! taking advantage of my kindness and hospitality. tsk! tsk! tsk! (sigh!)

Some people laugh at love..
They laugh at marriage..
They laugh at happiness..
It is because they have had bad experiences that deeply hurt them.
They are cynical now, doubting anything in life that is beautiful.

Don’t listen to these people.
Love is essential to a happy life.
Don’t be afraid to love someone totally and completely.
Love is the most fulfilling and beautiful feeling in the world.
Don’t be afraid that you will get hurt,
Or that the other person won’t love you,
There is a risk in everything you do,
And the rewards are never so great as what love can bring.

Things aren’t always perfect.
No one is perfect,
Therefore no relationship can be perfect,
But everything worth anything has flaws in it.

So take risks.
Love with all your heart.
Love with all your mind.
Let yourself get involved completely and honestly,
And enjoy the possibility that what happens
Might be the only real source of happiness…
It will be more than worthwile.

A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got  together to visit their old University of Notre Dame lecturer. Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work  and life.  Offering his guests coffee, the lecturer went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups -  porcelain, plastic, glass, some plain-looking and some expensive and exquisite, telling them to help themselves to hot coffee.

When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the lecturer said: "If you noticed, all the nice-looking, expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is but normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. What  all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the better cups and are eyeing each other’s cups."

"Now, if Life is coffee, then the jobs, money and position in  society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain Life, but the quality of Life doesn’t change."

"Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee in it."

When I was little, I used to believe
in the concept of one best friend,
and then I started to become a woman.
And then I found out that if you allow your heart
to open up, God would show you the best in many friends.  One friend is needed when you’re going through things with your man.  Another friend is needed when you’re going through things with your mom.  Another when you want to shop, share, heal, hurt, joke, or just be.

One friend will say let’s pray together, another
let’s cry together, another let’s fight together,
another let’s walk away together.  One friend will meet your spiritual need, another your shoe fetish, another
your love for movies, another will be with
you in your season of confusion, another will be
your clarifier, another the wind beneath your wings.

But whatever their assignment in your life,
on whatever the occasion, on whatever the day,
or wherever you need them to meet you with their gym
shoes on and hair pulled back, or to hold you back from
making a complete fool of yourself … those are your best friends.
It may all be wrapped up in one woman,
but for many it’s wrapped up in several…
one from 7th grade, one from high school, several
from the college years, a couple from old jobs,
several from church, on some days your mother,
on some days your neighbor, on others your sisters,
and on some days your daughters.

Cheers to the women that God has placed in my life.

Regardless of whom we meet or what we do or what we have become, it is the friends we grew up with that we feel closest to and that we have the most in common with.  Though we don’t see them often, when you do it is as tough you’re always together — so comfortable, so natural, so honest.  I guess old friends who know where we come from, who know our backgrounds, who know our families have an understanding of us that no new friend can ever have.  Never abandon an old friend.  You will never find one who will replace him/her.  Friendship is like wine.  It gets better as it grows older.

As days may pass, i know life will offer me trials as well as treasures, tears as well as triumphs.  Yet, i strive in walking down life’s winding pathways with courage, humor and hope, savoring fully my achievements and learning from my defeats.  As much as i can, i speak kindly of others…and think kindly of myself.  Be forgiving, no less of my own mistakes than of others… Learn to laugh…and to listen as much as i want to… Aspiring to an unreachable perfection, met merely to gain approval in the eyes of my loved ones… Realizing that i am capable of reaching difficult goals and exceeding them, of dreaming wonderful dreams and making them come true, of achieving the only kind of success that really matters–that of being at peace with myself and with the world around me…Striving instead, to live to the best of my ability by those personal honor and excellence which only i can set… and cherish above all my individuality.